Hallo again normies...

It's me! Dexter! You thought i wasn't coming back but here i am! Sucks for you, you have to listen to me talk again! HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAGNNJ N JDK *Cough*.

Ok, i know this post is very late so to make up for that i will be posting twice this week. The other will be on Friday and then posts will be every Friday after that. Got it? Cool.

Moving onto the good stuff, i want to talk about something, this being a minor epiphany i had the other day.
So, here it is:

My favourite animal

(Yes, that i how i'm spelling favourite and i'm not changing it)

The other day i decided i needed a new favourite animal. For a while it was the dragonfly but then changed to the cat as i buckled under the pressure of social conformity and unoriginality and basically just being on the internet for too long. I decided this was really boring and that cats probably weren't my favourite animal after all.

But then it struck me.

Was it a turtle? Was it a Hamster? Was it a lemur? A panther? A Candiru Fish?

No, it's obviously The Vampire Squid From Hell.

I bet you thought this was a squid for a second.
Yeah, you did, didn't you?
I can see it in your eyes.

So, why is this my favourite animal of all time? Well...

The reasons:


  • It's name is 'The Vampire Squid From Hell'.
  • It is a squid that looks like a vampire from hell.
  • Like many squid species, it can squirt ink. However, Vampire Squid ink is glow in the dark.
  • It has photophores - light producing organs. It can make strange lights flash all over it's body in any way it wants. typically creating 2 lights on top of it's head to look like the eyes of the larger fish. This scares the cunkmuffin (See my last post) Out of any predator coming it's way.
  • It, as a last resort, has the ability to TURN ITSELF INSIDE OUT AND BACK AGAIN TO PROTECT IT FROM PREDATORS. IT CAN LITERALLY TURN ITSELF INSIDE OUT.
  • I've known about the Vampire Squid for a long time and it has a special place in my heart.
  • It is truly the king of all invertebrates. All hail the Vampire Squid.
Unfortunately, i cannot find a free image of Mr Squid, so you must Google it. Google is magical and can show you things like that.

Rounding off

A bit of interaction!
1. My posts are pretty long. Should i shorten them?
2. Are you enjoying looking at my blog?
3. Should i put more effort into checking for grammatical errors etc.? Spellchecking is HARD and EFFORT and I HaVe WAy MOre IMPorTaNt THinGs tO Do.

That's all from your friendly neighbourhood Interdimensional Toaster. As usual, be civil to each other in the comment section. Not like anyone writes anything though. ALL BYYYYY MYYYYYY SEEEEELF

-Dexter


Comments

  1. DexterWhoFebruary 20, 2018 at 9:49 AM

    I'm going to always put a joke here, I've decided. Here is a joke:

    Me.

    I already know where the exit is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. WistyFebruary 20, 2018 at 11:28 AM

      Dear Dexter
      Did you get my reply appreciating your wise and enlightening exposition of the zeitgeist?
      Yours Groany xxx

      Delete
    2. DexterWhoFebruary 21, 2018 at 9:32 AM

      I do believe i did not.

      Delete
  2. somethinglFebruary 28, 2018 at 11:37 AM

    Dear dexter I agree spell check IS hard

    ReplyDelete

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