Hoi, i'm Dexter

February 11, 2018

Well hello there my good friend;

I'm Dexter. The reason i'm writing this is because someone convinced me that i should become a blogger and write about 'my writing',. Yeah. Yeeeeaaaaaah. Really. Anyway, i know absolutely nothing about blogging and i'm about to go and write a blog so let's just play things on the wing here.

How to introduce myself?

Well, i once saw somebody writing a blog for a website called 'I can't put a name here because blogging sites don't like people mentioning other blogging sites' because people were being made to set up accounts. Nobody ever wrote anything on the site ever again. That aside, this is what she wrote:

"Just before I start this i want you to know that i'm not weird or crazy or anything. I'm not an alien mushroom from the planet bleeble, just a normal person."

I, however, make no suggestions that I am not an alien mushroom from the planet beeble.

Yep. That's how it's gonna be. In 2 words; completely bizarre. So now that's out the way, let me tell you a bit about myself:

Name: DexterWho but not really, but really, First person to figure out what that means gets a metaphorical cookie. Well done you.
Age: 903.
Location: Gallifrey.
Occupation: Spouting garbage on blogger now apparently. Actually it's just a hobby.
Gender: Closet transdimensional toaster.
Mental stability: Borderline 40 percent.

BuT DeXtEr, I wAnT tO KNOe aLL ABut U So WE Can BEe BEsTIez

Well, i don't feel comfortable about sharing personal details online. For now i will just be an anonymous ~~furry~~ possible human who spouts garbage on blogger as mentioned earlier.

How to contact me if you REALLY want to

PLEASE bear in mind I don't have Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter Facebook and i'm not giving you my phone number.

Phone number: 999 (DO NOT TRY THIS OUT PLEASE)
Snapchat: 1tz_s3lf13_Tqk3r_PVP
Insta: Th0t_101
Youtube: Dexter who although i am not active and do not post content. Sub to me anyway WINKY FACE HAHAHAHAHAHGBNMNBFBNMGYTG,,MHGFDW.
Website: The Greatest Webpage Ever (Not published, you won't find it).
Online gaming: DexterWho, Dexter, Dfxtfr, similar.

Basically you can't contact me outside of Blogger.

BUt DeTXeR-

No.

ANNNND FINALLY

What do people want me to write about? I could write about important life issues, such as:

What is the meaning of life?
When is the new season of Doctor Who hitting television?
Is nuclear war immanent?
Who is going to win GOS 2018?
Is there a God?
DEAR LORD WHY DON'T THEY REMOVE THAT DEAD PIGEON FROM TOOTING STATION ALREADY IT'S LEGIT HANGING FROM A DANGER HIGH VOLTAGE SIGN ON A PIECE OF WIRE!!!!!!1111!!!!!!1111!!11!one!11!1!1one!
Climate change - what can be done?

Or i can write about more lighthearted topics:

The 7 wonders of Tooting station.
Awkward things that happen on the bus.
What i'm actually interested in.
Why does Blogger not capitalize i's I only remember to do it half of the time so it's a weird 50-50 mix.
Lots of other stuff.
How I probably can't swear violently on blogging sites so i'll use made up profanity instead like 'cunkmuffin'.

And i'll hopefully be posting this stuff weekly, so you can enjoy my nonsense all the time.

Just like that, i appear to be done. One more thing i'll say - if there is a comment section, be decent. Criticism is fine, but being a harbinger of the apocalypse is not. If there is not a comment section, this last bit is pretty stupid. Ah well. This post is really long now.